Overload

It funny how words that we use daily can sometimes not be found in the English dictionary. Now I'll grant  you this I only looked this word up on Webster.com, so who is to say that you could not find it else where. If you have not figured out what word I am talking about just check out the title of my post.."overload". Think about how many times you either think, say or refer to the idea of being overloaded. We use is to much in reference to being overloaded at work, emotionally overloaded,  or physically overloaded. I am sure there are other references to this idea as well. It has been a week for the books for me. And it all started last Wednesday, when I found out that my grandfather would not be recovering from the long battle he has been fighting over the past three months. Some of you have read my past post and know most of the story. He has become too weak to fight anymore and hospice has been called in. I continue to pray but I also know that he is tried and I truly believes that he is ready to go home and most likely not this earthy home. Which even now makes me cry but I know he will be without pain there. My plans for fall break change but more was to come. I went home visited him and family and then headed to Ruston to visit friends.

On my way home that Sunday I heard the news that my maw maw(my dad's mom) was probably not going to make it through the next 24 hours. About four hours later I got the call while at home with my sister, my maw maw had passed away. This was very heart breaking, my maw maw was one of the Godliest women I have ever known. She and her husband practically built the church that I grew up in from the ground up. She had been suffering from Alzheimer for some time. She will be missed but I know that she is in heaven whole and hanging out with Jesus. The visitation was Tuesday and the funeral Wednesday. I then started the long trip back south on Thursday morning in the rain.

Sooo, to say that I am emotionally overloaded is an understatement. Place this on top of the fact that I really did not get any home work done this week and I have Fall Festival at my church. It all seems like the walls just may come crashing down! It is how other aspects of life can affect how a person interprets other incidents and things that are said or seen. Some thing that can seem so innocent or have nothing to do with  you can tend to affect some one more then is necessary. Now truth be told this may just be because I am a girl and well lets face it, girls tend to be more emotional then boys. Yes guys we admit to it, ok maybe not all of us but it is true.

However, I say all that mostly because I needed to let go, I needed to just be able to share my feelings. I do have comfort however, I know that I will see my maw maw again and while I don't know if I will see my grandfather again alive on this earth I know I will see him again one day in Heaven. While I may be overloaded school and work wise..I know that the Fall Festival is going to be a blast and I could not have pulled it off with out the amazing help of other people at my church. And while I may not do that well on the school work that I have coming I know that "this too shall pass" and that I will make it and as long as I learn what I need to I will be ok.

I think the one thing that I am learning more and more daily is to Trust in the Lord! It is a lesson that we learn with each new trial, each new assignment, and each new day.

Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Selah

Psalm 62:8

I wish I could say that I stick to this verse on a daily bases that I pour out my heart to him that I place my trust always in him. But I don't because I am human. In fact I really had no intention to have this post head in the direction of scripture, but...as I keep reading the words "God is our refuge" I am reminded that he loves us no matter whether or not we remember this and other verses like it daily.